Stressed to the max

I feel like my head is going to implode. I have had a migraine for three days now. I think it started when I decided that I have found a townhome I like and that I want to purchase. That means pinching pennies, cashing in side funds, yada yada yada and coming up with a chunk of change to cover earnest money to let the seller know I'm serious, an inspection to make sure I'm not getting screwed, AND an application fee for the actual mortgage from the bank. All on top of hoping no one else has decided this is "the one" and does all of this before me!

Long story short, it is a three story duplex in a four unit association. It was built in 1938 and comes with a lot of character. Hardwood floors, original crown molding, updated kitchen and bathroom with tile. New applicances. Main floor living area, 2nd floor master, bath and guestroom. Third floor half bath and two rooms that I would turn into a office as it is basically a finished attic. Like I said, great character. The boyfriend came with last night to inspect the nuts and bolts of it. He seems to have deemed it acceptable except the "character" doesn't appeal to him. Tough, I liked it. And for me, that is important, I have to like the place I'm going to commit to buying.

Now, mom is still sick. She has been out of the hospital since Saturday. For an update, she developed a methicillin resistant staph aureus pneumonia. for the non-medical, that means a bad ass pneumonia immune to the most commonly used antibiotics. Thus, she is now on IV antibiotics through a PICC line at home. The bonus, the are not the gentlest drugs on your kidneys and her kidneys don't work that great thanks to tumor in her abdomen that keeps clasping the stents they have placed. She saw her oncologist today, plan is to attempt to continue with chemotherapy, her internal medicine doctor checked her labs, he is increasing the number of days on the antibiotic. She is tired, worn out, and confused on what she should do. Mentioned just not wanting to live like this. Not sure the translation on that but....you get the picture.

In two days, my much anticipated new boss starts. I can't wait but it means new hours, uncertainity, stepping outside of my box. Right now, i would like to just stay in my box, turn off the lights, curl up with a box of chocolate and a blanket and hum the theme to the Smurfs to block out the real world.

Now, there is every cliche' in the book. It all happens for a reason, what is meant to be will be, it all works out in the end. All that said, it still is stressful. Cried my way through dinner at Panera with the boyfriend last night, was bitchy as hell and probably bit his head off when I shouldn't have (he's just trying to help) and I have had a massive headache since Sunday that seems to be resisting every 6 hour tylenol, two doses of migraine medicine, and lots of water and caffiene. I'm going to attempt to pack my head in ice with another round of meds at bedtime and see what happens.

In the meantime, I'm destressing in the best way I know how. Cooking two different types of lasagna and brownies in preparation for 10 people coming to my house for my friend Dan's going away party. he said tomorrow night would work so I made it to wally world last night, got the necessaries, and tonight I have prepped. Lasagna's are layered and chilled. Soon the brownies will be baking. Tomorrow when I get home from my Sports Medicine appt to have molds made of my feet for orthodics I will only have to stick the pans in the oven, turn it on, mix the salad, heat the bread and corn, and be done :) Food, wine and friends. that should help.